Catharsis of the Bogue

Kidneys, Kettlebells, Car Repair, Migraines, Fishing, Diapers, and Stay at Home Dad Stuff

The Footsteps of My Mother…How I Follow.

Growing up I always wanted to be like my Dad. He was strong, smart, and full of a barely restrained rage that got him through the tough times. I learned many things working around the house with him and I just didn’t get other things that he really hoped were ingrown in HIS son. Alas, in several ways I am a miserable failure in his eyes.

Not the least of which has been my decisions since I started to have kids. I have tried to finish college several times now and I am very close. It just seems like things keep getting in the way and I am left being a stay at home dad. Don’t get me wrong, I love my kids and this is a fantastic opportunity to bond with them when they are young. Think how it must (and does) irk Mr. Ex-Navy SEAL, Type A+ personality Dad.

The reasons behind the stay at home part are many and they may end up their own posts. This latest round was mostly to take care of my youngest daughter. She was diagnosed with End Stage Renal Disease or Kidney Failure just before her first birthday. They told us right then she would need extensive dialysis and eventually a kidney transplant. So, through this that and the other, (I think I will write a book about this. Ebook or real? Any thoughts?) I stayed home and shuttled her to dialysis 4 times per week for 2 years. She finally got a kidney transplant last May and is now only going to the doctor once a month so I am freed up.

That is one of the reasons I am blogging now. I am working on my writing skills, I do have a couple of ideas for books that I would like to actually sell. Maybe I can parlay my blog into the cash to do school and finish up those pesky 18 credits.

Now back to my main point, I am a stay at home dad. I am following in my mother’s footsteps and not entirely my father’s. And I don’t care. I am proud to be able to take care of the house and the kids as well as the yard and the car. I can change a water pump or a diaper with equal ease, if not equal time. I can rebuild a wall or teach my first grader how to read. I can do dishes or divide fractions with my 9 year old. I can field dress a deer or wash laundry.

I am proud to follow my mother’s example and do all of these things. I am proud to be a writer and will be more proud when I am a successful one. I know what it takes to keep the house running now, and my hat’s off to those mom’s and dad’s who stay home and do it.

Now, go do something useful!


  1. I think you are more of a good father than following you mother’s footsteps. When your kids grow, they will realize your courage and dedication in taking care of them. Proud of you they will be indeed. 🙂

  2. This is a really compelling story, Justin.

    I think it is great that you have this opportunity to be with the kids during the critical developmental times, when they really need guidance.
    You sound to be a well rounded multi-tasker, which is a really good thing.
    Keep writing and you can later weave these articles into a great story of life.

    Thanks for the read, I appreciate you sharing the story.
    Had any deer burgers lately? Man, I love those. 🙂
    I am not half-bad on a hind quarter either, after I have seasoned and marinated for several days.
    Making me hungry dude! LOL
    .-= Jimi Jones´s last blog ..10 Blog Launch Tips =-.

  3. Justin,
    Have you read Wild at Heart?  
    One of the parts that got to me was ‘the wound’ which is what most fathers (usually without intending) do to their sons.  It made me cry and helped me deal with my father.  And just so you know, a college degree means shit.  Except for the fact that lazy employers use it to screen applicants.  At best, it is vocational training but we have lost the idea of teaching people how to think and learn their way through life.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.