Oddities, Profundities, Profanities and Dad Stuff

Category: Rants! (Page 6 of 11)

A list of People to Kill…

Ok so this isn’t really a list of people to kill and I am probably on some CIA watch list now but you are here and reading arent you?  There is a special prize if you read until the end.

Today’s post was inspired by my wife’s OBGYN office.  Not the doctor, the receptionists, nurses and lab people all left me with a very bad vibe today.  If you didn’t know, My wife is pregnant.  She is due the first part of July and she had to have a test that would be considered cruel and unusual punishment in most countries around the world.  We had to go in for the wonderfully exciting 3 hour glucose tolerance test for gestational diabetes.  Without recapping the whole day time by time, here is what I observed.

1.  Glucose drink may as well be Karo syrup.

2. It says on the bottle may cause Nausea (check), cramping (check), Diarrhea (check).  And the lab techs are surprised at any of these symptoms.

3.  Certain 4 letter words that rhyme with “Truck” keep coming up in conjunction with this test.

4.  My poor wife, she is ready to puke, feeling terrible, cramping and ready to toss her cookies (she couldn’t really have cookies of course) and be done with the test.  The Nurse and the lab techs keep coming out and asking if she is ok and needing to get he blood drawn.

It was a long 3 hours.  There was a point where I really wanted to stand up and yell, “OK Somebody has to die now, You guys choose who it is!”

By the end of it, everything turned out fine and My wife is a trooper.  She made it through without killing anyone or puking on them.  It is funny to watch her argue with the nurses, she is a nurse too and can cut through the BS that the OBGYN nurse spouts like a hot hammer through butter.  Not even a knife stroke, smashed.  It makes me happy when she can put them in their places.  She has learned a lot of things being a trauma Nurse that a specialized nurse in a doctors office can’t even begin to understand.

They should outlaw this test.  This post may have been a better rant over at www.cantankerousoldcoots.com but I wrote it here first.  Take that and….I digress.

Ok you have read until the end so here is your prize.  You get tomorrow’s post for free!  Simply sign on to http://justinsbrainpan.com and read happily!  Sign up for my mailing list and you will get  an exclusive download released on Friday!!!  Thanks for reading

-Justin!

Seeking out the flash we want instead of the stuff we need

I love to fish.  I would be fishing now if I wanted to be cold.  Most of the lakes and rivers are still somewhat frozen here in Utah.  I am getting that spring bug though.

I was at Walmart the other day looking over the sporting good section like I usually do and it got me thinking.  How much of this is what my grandpa used to call “bait for fishermen” and not worth the money to buy?  Answer, most of it.  There is so much of every type of plug, popper, spinner, spoon, crankbait, or gimmick that it is oerwhelming to look at.

Of course I have a bunch of gear but it is gear that I chose to buy for one reason or another, based onhow it my catch fish.  I don’t have anything that looks like a beer can or a pile of junk.  I have good colors and shapes that willhelp me catch fish.  Period.

One of the best things that ever happened to me was when we moved.  I lost all of my fishing gear except for my poles.  as near as I can figure, my tackle boxes were lifted while I was loading up the truck.  I have not noticed anything else missing.  the only things I was not happy about losing were 2 of my good reels but, I guess someone else needed them worse than me.  I hope they got into fishing because of it.

I have replaced everything that I wanted to and now have a kit that I am really happy with.  I can’t wait to use it this summer.

I thought about all of this and how it applies to the internet. There is a lot of flash and bait on the net.  I have it on my site in affiliate programs and I will have in the future for product offers.  You can google anything and get millions of hits.  The secret is guessing at the good stuff and leaving the garbage.  There is plenty of both around the internet.

Sometimes it is beneficial to clean out the old stuff and start over.  I have dumped my bookmarks in the past and started over.  I am thinking about cleaning out my twitter.  I am considering purging chaff from my RSS reader as well.

The only real advice I am going to give is this.  Decide to do something and do it.  Decide on a post idea, write it (time permitting).  Decide to comment, do it.  Decide to purge, do it.  I am finally sick of myself putting things off and talking about doing things that never quite get around to happening.  Now, I am doing it.

So, Go Do Something.  NOW! Get out of here!

Justin

Digging for and Dusting Off Post Ideas

hey folks.  Today is the day.  Well technically Friday is the day the Pre-Writing Challenge starts.  Today I plan to raid my old notebooks and search out all of the bits of paper that I can find with any sort of writing idea on it.

I should have enough ideas to fill my challenge list and much more. I was reading through some papers that I had in a box a while ago. Most of them were drafts of projects from high school and different writing projects that I have done. I looked at these and said, “I should rewrite this one”. I have a few stories like that. I am going to rework some of them and maybe they can be published.

I have one set that I have always loved. It is a first person detective comedy that is filled with rampant sarcasm but not very good writing. I have 4 stories in the series that get better and better. I always thought they could be published together as the ZXC Chronicles. I have notes for part 5, I think I am going to rewrite that whole thing.

If that same box there are several little notes with band names, story ideas, snippets of song lyrics and words that sounded good together at one time.  Many of these snippets could be blog posts and some could be quite good or quite profound.  Maybe just something funny.  I think that as part of the Pre Writing Challenge I will try some different styles of posts.  Funny, ironic, list, classical hungarian, ok maybe not that one.  I am going to use this challenge to not only write more, but to expand the depth of my writing, which is one of the reasons I started blogging in the first place.

Short one today, have to get the munchkin to the hospital for tests.  Kidney Transplant doctors are paranoid when fevers top 102 degrees.

Until Tomorrow,

Justin

PS Did I mention my Pre-Writing Challenge Page???  check it out!

This is the one where I Rant on Energy Drinks.

Anyone like energy drinks?  I have quit most of them but there are days when I can’t see my keyboard without them.  Having the new baby doesn’t help with that.

Caffeine is the thing that is so needed.  Wake up.  Now I don’t drink coffee so the best avenue for caffeine besides the pills (which are weird for some reason) is the energy drink.  My question is, who came up with the idea that most of them have to taste like monkey piss?

Red Bull is the original offender, and probably the worst.  There are plenty of imitators and none are the better!  Granted there are many other flavors now,  but there are still 2 basic schools of flavor.  Monkey piss, otherwise known as, I really don’t know what it is supposed to be citrus maybe?  and then the fruity flavors.

The fruity flavors are the best, in my opinion because I don’t like drinking monkey piss.  I tried a new drink the other day and much to my chagrin, it was monkey piss flavor.  I guess it is time to give up the things all together.  Besides, they are too expensive.

Anyone else feel the same about energy drinks?  anyone with a deep seated love affair with Red Bull?  Let me know in the comments, I am going to try and go the week without any energy drinks.  Can you?

-Justin

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