Catharsis of the Bogue

Oddities, Profundities, Profanities and Dad Stuff

Page 55 of 76

When the Older Generation is almost gone…


Records_Coal_Processing_Corp._Plant,_Wellington,_Utah**Editors Note** It has been a year and a half since I started this post.  I didn’t know what to do with it, I was not sure how to finish it.  Now, the direction is a bit different and the meaning is more profound for me. **

 

Far out in the uncharted backwaters of Utah, some 140 miles to the southeast of my house lies a quiet little town nestled in the foothills of the Book Cliffs.

Residing in a house that is 67 years old lives a woman who is only 22 years older than the house.  (That’s 89 just in case you can’t do the math.) It was to this little old house that the family and I ventured to a couple of weeks ago. The city is East Carbon, but will forever be known to me as Dragerton. It is the place where my Dad was born and raised, the place where many members of my family came seeking work in the coal mines.

Now, I would love to say that this is a beautiful little oasis in the desert, but the fact is, the town is dying. Lack of jobs keeps the population low.  Many of the houses there, including my Aunt’s were built before 1948 by the coal companies, so there were places for the workers to live.  Workers bought the houses from the company, the company ran a store, and basically controlled everything in town.  to start with.  You have heard that Tennessee Ernie Ford song 16 tons?  The line in there about “St. Peter don’t you call me cause I can’t go, I owe my soul to the company store….”  Yea exactly.

Publicity photo of Tennessee Ernie Ford from t...

Tennessee Ernie Ford

When I first started this post I intended to write about how the town was dying but people kept living there because it was their home.  About how my great Aunt moved there from Indiana with her husband, her sister (my grandma), my Grandpa, and my Great Grandparents.  About how they lived and scraped by, about how she buried 2 husbands there and still returns to run her own house.  How we would visit her to hear stories of the old times, of my Uncle that I never met, and of my Uncle that I knew and had a special place for.

We would go down and look at pictures of the old mines, and learn about the jobs that they guys had, things they found, like dinosaur footprints on the ceiling.  (No it’s true.  millions of years ago dinosaurs wandered all over what is now Utah and they left footprints in the muddy stream beds and swampy areas that eventually fossilized.  The plant matter below became coal and when they dug out the coal, the stone footprints were on the ceiling.  There are a few of them in the Natural History Museum at the College of Eastern Utah in Price.  It’s kind of cool.)

 

Now, the focus of this post has changed.  My Aunt used to go to Arizona in the winters and live in Dragerton during the rest of the year.  But she is now 91, (92 in just a few days) and she is finally getting frail.  She has always been such a great example of strength and endurance but she is just getting old.  This past winter she couldn’t go to Arizona any more.  It was just too hard, and she is having trouble walking and getting up by her self. She is now in an assisted care center where they can help her get up and not fall.  They have meals for her and make sure that she has company.  She still talks about going back home to Dragerton and having us all come and visit.  I would like that, but I don’t think it is going to be possible.

 

What hasn’t changed about this post is the main idea.  I set out to write about the end of some things.  My Aunt is the last of the older generation in my life on my Dad’s side of the family.  My Grandparents are all gone on both sides, My wife’s grandparents are gone.  The only one left is my Aunt, and I honestly don’t know how much longer that will last.  I am privileged to have known my great grandparents and my grandparents as well as my aunt and uncle.  The history that they have seen, the exploits, the hunting trips, the fun times, the lean times, the family times are all stories that I used to just absorb at nights on the patio, or out shooting, or hunting rabbits.  Now, to think that only my Dad or his sister, or me know these stories brings about some sadness.

 

Life is one of those things that you always know will end, but you never want it too.  I am glad that 2 of my kids knew their Great Grandfather, and they all know their Great Great Aunt.  That generation has values and sensibilities that seem old fashioned and worn out now but those are important to me.  I try really hard to keep some of those values alive and not let my kids become entitled little whiners that have everything given to them.  I think that has helped them deal with all of the challenges we have faced as a family, from a kidney transplant to losing our home.  They know what is important, Family.

 

None of us want to dwell on the fact that my Aunt is in the final stages of her life.  She has always seemed so…permanent.  But we know, that it will come eventually.  All we can do now is visit and talk and recall those times when we were down there with her as well as learn all of the stories that she can tell us.  It won’t be the same without her.  My Dad will be the oldest one at that point, and my kids will get stories from him, but, for me, those will never be as good as the ones I heard growing up.

 

That big wheel just keeps on turning as Lynyrd Skynyrd says,  and eventually I will be the one regaling my grandkids with stories.  My mother and father will be ailing, and I hope that my kids, and their kids not only know who they are but have the respect for them that I do with my older generations.

 

It seems things will never end when you are young, but they do.  We just have to honor the memories we have and not let the stories and history die with the people that we love.

 

Talk later.

 

-Justin

 

 

 

The first sentence of this post was inspired by the lovely and talented Courtney Cantrell, who wrote this post on my buddy Aaron’s blog and just made me smile.  You see I love those Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy books.  Go read them if you haven’t.  It will be worth it and someday your life may depend on your towel.

 

I also found this picture, it is the hospital in Dragerton.  My Dad was the first one born there in 1951, and his sister was the last one born there in 1964.  Go Figure.

 

Dragerton_Hospital_which_serves_surrounding_communities_and_mines._Dragerton,_Carbon_County,_Utah._-_NARA_-_540535

 

 

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Functional Strength and Inner Strength

Hello All.  I really need to get my prewriting done so that I can post at the same time every day.  This has been another day of labs and running.  I haven’t decided if it is a good thing or not that my 3 year old is so good for blood draws.  with the help of some numbing cream she doesn’t flinch or even cry anymore.  She is amazing.  My wife works in an ER and she comes home with stories of football players and “manly men” that cry and blubber over the sight of a needle.  And my 3 year old puts them to shame.  I am so proud.

She is small but a great example to me of Inner Strength.  The part I am focusing on here is just doing what needs to be done, no matter what.  She put up with 9 major surgeries and 2 years worth of 4x per week dialysis (about 4 hours per session) and didn’t complain much.  She puts out her arm for blood draws and puts up with more prodding and poking by doctors than should be legal.  And then she comes home and plays like a normal kid.  I only hope that I can be that strong inside.

I am not actively working on inner strength.  I am working on Functional Strength.  My motto has been “I don’t care how big my arms are, I want to lift and move heavy things like rocks, cars, small buildings, things like that.”  I chose Kettlebells to do much of this with for reasons I am going to get into in another post.

I have been a huge advocate of functional strength for long time.  I figure you should be able to do things with muscle.  You should be able to break rocks with a sledge hammer or carry Costco sized bags of dog food around without a problem.  I started this train of thought almost 15 years ago on a rabbit hunt.

Here is the story.  My sister was engaged to this guy who was a gymnast.  He was fairly good at gymastics and had far out hopes to be an olympian.  He had the visible muscles that women swoon over and considered himself strong.  So, my Dad and I decided to take him on a rabbit hunt in the desert with us.  We went down to central Utah where my Dad grew up and started out walking.  We walked all day, up and down hills, and covered several miles.  Over that time we had to stop several times.  It wasn’t for me or my Dad.  It was for Mr. Gymnast.  He then fell asleep on the drive home and slept the whole way.  We completely wore him out and he was in the best “shape” of any of us!  That was my first wake up call.  You can be strong and functional overall or you can be strong in a specific way that is not good for long durations.

Now, I have always been strong.  My Dad always made me move things and help.  He always had us walking either hiking or hunting.  Even fishing is an active sport for him.  Fly fishing is great because you walk up the stream for 5 miles or so before you stop.  He has never quite given up the “Give Em Hell” attitude that he earned in the SEALs.  But, while I am not him I have been taught to push until you collapse.  Or close to it.  I have always been able to move fridges and couches with not much problem.  I hauled a piano on a dolly out of a guys basement pretty much by myself.  I have always been able to walk most of the day with a pack.  But I know there is more that I want to do.  I am using the kettlebells and punching bags to be fit over my whole body and finally be able to do pullups.  I always thought that my shoulders just would not let me do pullups.  I now know that I just don’t have “those” muscles built up enough to do them.  That will change. And it will change with old school equipment, no aerobics or fu-fu machines.

I know that if I build up my functional strength with kettlebells and the punching bag, (and yard work, there are many trenches to be dug and rocks to be hauled in my yard) that will help my Inner Strength that I am not actively working on.  Every time I complete one of my goals or can lift something heavier or for a longer duration it boosts my ego and self esteem.  Every boost builds up the inner strength by making me think that I can do anything.  At this point even setbacks are positive, my inner strength is building and not letting me quit.  Even needing to go back to some basics is not a setback, just a refinement of technique.  Doing what has to be done without complaining.  Lessons from a 3 year old girl that a 35 year old man is finally beginning to understand.

My goals right now, are to make my body stronger and to make my writing stronger.  Functionally Stronger, able to lift cars and rocks, able to write coherent readable posts and stories.  Internally Stronger, able to push past mental barriers, able to put out content under pressure.

Better, more focused writing and overall strength.  I think those are good goals.

Thanks for indulging me.

Justin

Fiction Saturday 2! Jackson Malone Part 4

If you haven’t read part 1 yet,

Or even Part 2,

Or even Part 3,  this will make next to no sense.

When we left our Story last time:

I turned left and entered a small living room that was dominated by a huge bay window.  This window took up most of the north wall.  I walked over to the window and looked out.  This was a perfect view of the warehouse across the street.  An arsonist may have liked this view as his handiwork burned.  But I was not on that case.  This room had been lived in, the carpet worn thin in several spots, but it was relatively clean.  Not exactly brimming over with clues.

And now for Part 4:

I walked towards a doorway in the east wall to find a small kitchen that smelled of rancid bacon.  This room had a small table with 2 chairs and the portable TV that the officer had been watching.  This room had also been cleaned up to sell the house.

The only signs of life were the sandwich wrappers and the TV that obviously belonged to the cop.  There was one window in the kitchen that had been broken out and repaired with cardboard and duct tape.  The linoleum was the same worn color of orange that lined the hall.  Still, it had been swept.  I shook my head because I still had no clues as I went back out the door to the kitchen and to a door on the south wall of the living room.

“This is the murder scene.” The cop murmured.  I didn’t reply.  The small window in this room was covered with a dirty green velvet curtain only allowing a trickle of light through.  I flipped the switch on the wall and was not prepared for the sight that assailed me.

This was the bedroom, complete with a sagging twin bed that looked as if it had been dyed a dark brown.  There were splatters on the wall, the ceiling, the floor and all of the furnishings in the room.  The acrid metallic smell of blood permeated everything.  “Damn.” I said looking at the carnage.  “None of this was in the newspapers.”

“No.” the cop replied.  “We have kept a lid on it.  No one would want to buy this place otherwise.  What it looks like is one homeless guy kills another over a place to sleep.  We do suspect that the arsonist from the warehouse across the street is either involved or is Moran himself.”  I placed my hands in the pockets of my trenchcoat and squatted near the ground.

“Did you find a weapon?” I asked.  “Yea.  There was a piece of pipe in the backyard with blood all over it.  No fingerprints though.  That is what broke that window in the kitchen.  The guy who did this would have been covered in blood too, but with homeless guys who ever pays attention to what they are wearing.”  “Hmmm…” I mumbled as I entered the room.

I could tell that the cops had done a good job going over this bloodbath and didn’t disturb the blood soaked contents of the room.  I didn’t see anything offhand that they may have missed.  I stood, turned and left the room.

“You guys got anything else in this case?” I asked as I was going towards the front door.  “Just the dead guy, this house and that pipe.  Seems pretty open and shut.  Homeless guy kills other homeless guy over the big prize and a bed to sleep in.”  The cop replied.  “What big prize?”  I asked.  “Oh yea this may help.  This house is the prize.  Every night hundreds of those homeless guys fight for the right to sleep here.  I’m not sure how they do it but it seems your boy Moran was king of the hill that night and someone didn’t like it.”

We reached the doorway and I opened the door while taking all of this in.  “That’s the way we are taking it.  This case will be in the unsolved pile and I will be gone as soon as the insurance guys finish their investigation.  No one will give a crap in a week.”  He was probably right but I didn’t give him the satisfaction of a reply.  I stuffed my hands back into my coat pockets and walked out the door.

I spent the next day in my office trying to figure out a motive or angle.  Something the cop at the house said to me kept sticking.  The fact that the homeless in the area compete for the right to sleep in that house was strange.  Why not several of them in the house at once?  There were several rooms that could hold several people.  They could compete over one room but the whole house?  Maybe that was their way of just having some privacy, and some unwritten street code kept everyone honest about it.  Well almost honest anyway.  Nelson Moran was still dead.

The next day came too quickly.  I was back in my office when I called one of my old friends in the police department.  It seemed that the insurance people had finished with that they needed and the crime scene cleaners were there now.  The police presence was finished.  The house was back on the market.   The competition should be underway tonight.  I was going down there to find out the truth.  Or die trying.

Join us again next week for Part 5 of Jackson Malone!

And if you liked this story you may enjoy Death With A Vengeance, my previous Fiction Saturday story, available here as an e-book!Thanks for reading, see you next week

-Justin

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