Oddities, Profundities, Profanities and Dad Stuff

Tag: Family (Page 4 of 4)

SAHD Friday: Postponed and Halloween!

Halloween icon
Image via Wikipedia

Hello all.  It seems like forever since I had a Friday post up.  That is terrible.  I really have to figure out how to structure Friday posts and get them written ahead of time.  That pre-writing challenge was great for that, I need to get back to it.

Anyhow, Today I want to talk a bit about my favorite holiday, Halloween!  I just love the fall festival of all things macabre and horrific.  It is my chance to watch all of the horror movies that I want to without anyone wondering if I have a screw loose.  My wife thinks I am just getting pointers but I really am not.

Because I didn’t get this post pout earlier, I am sitting here writing while keeping an eye on my 4 year old in the bath.  Our whole family just finished carving our Jack O’Lanterns for this year.  We have to keep the evil spirits away!

I don’t know if you all carve pumpkins or not but it is a very fun family activity.  Everyone, except the 4 month old got to participate.  We have started going to a local farmer to get our pumpkins so each of the kids gets to pick out their own and then we go home and carve the things.  I think the bulk of the fun for them is choosing and then cleaning the pumpkin.

I will get some pictures and post them in a while, probably monday with some others of the carnage that is left over from Halloween.  I hope you all are planning on doing something fun with your families this Halloween weekend.  There is plenty of time to go rent an old horror flick (we have Poltergeist ready in the DVD player with Transylvania 6-5000 right behind) and pop some corn!

Then there is Trick Or Treating tomorrow or Sunday depending where you are (here it is going to be saturday).  Get out and enjoy some good fun and scares with your family!

-Justin

PS if you don’t have kids and like gory horror movies, I went to Saw 3D last night and it was way cool.  The new 3D is incredible.

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SAHD Friday: How to you delegate?

Hello Folks.  Well as you have noticed, it is Friday and that now means it is Stay At Home Dad Friday!  from now on, I will have Friday posts just pertaining to Stay At Home Dad Stuff.  (If you didn’t catch the stylish acronym, SAHD is Stay at Home Dad.  It is also like “sad” which I may have to address later.)

Today, I want to look at how you divide up household duties to your kids based on their ages.  This is something that my wife and I are currently working on.  As may or may not be known, I have a 9 year old who is almost 10, a 7 year old and a 4 year old.  As of this writing, on 6/25 we are 10 days away from #4.

Our dilemma has been how much do we expect or how much should we expect from each kid.  Our 9 year old is wanting more and more responsibility and we are giving it to her.  She is old enough now to do thing like load the dishwasher or even mow the lawn.  The interesting thing, We haven’t had her doing much up until now so how much can we expect before a revolt?

So far it has been ok.  She cleans a bit more, and has a few more chores, and she does fine.  When the new baby comes I suspect that she will step up on her own and help to clean and take care of the baby.  Recently we raised her allowance to compensate for that.  I think she is ok.

Now for the 7 year old.  For the longest time, we had an inflated idea of what he could handle.  At 6, we actually had to scale back his chores slightly.  We found out that he could handle putting his clothes away but hanging up his shirts was a bit much.  We would try and try and yell and threaten to get him to hang up his clothes but it was just too much for him to handle.  We took that part out of his chores and he does very well.  Now, he voluntarily hangs up most of his clothes, because he can handle it now.

Likewise, the kids have been required to set and clear the table for dinner for a few years now.  One would set while the other would clear after dinner.  We are about ready to get the 4 year old involved with that.  Anyway, My son (the 7 year old) could clear the table but had a hard time wiping the placemats.  We took that out of his chores and he does much better.  Now he will wipe some of the table.

As for the 4 year old, her chores are cleaning up her room.  Just picking up her papers, shoes and a few toys.  She has a hard time some days.

Now, the biggest thing I have noticed with all of the kids is distraction.  They all get distracted.  They have small attention spans and are distracted by shiny or flashy things.  How do you get beyond that?  You have to observe your kids.  pay attention to what they can do.  Pay attention to what they like.  My son has always been fascinated with wheels.  He was 1year old and would hang over the side of the stroller to watch the wheels go around.

We used that in a bunch of learning games, trucks and wheels would get him to focus.  All in all that is what you have to figure out.  What works with your kids.  The hard part is not expecting all of them to be the same.  I have had a very hard time not holding the younger kids to the same benchmarks as the older one.  It is a continuous up and down observational period.

I think the biggest thing that you can do is to watch what works for the kids.  Watch what they do and what they can do.  Give them chores that seem appropriate and then add or subtract as they work.  You ultimately want to create a balance in what you assign them and what they can actually complete.  There is no simple formula.  There is no magic chart.  If there were, I would make a million dollars from it.  As it is, you just have to take my advice from experience.

Spend time with your kids.  Learn about them.  Give them opportunites to grow and feed their passions.  You may be surprised at what you end up with.

More next week!

-Justin

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Nothing But A Pile Of Sticks: Part 6- The Aftermath

Christmas lights in a residential neighbourhoo...

Image via Wikipedia

Previous posts on the Pile of Sticks Series were written when the wounds were fresh and the ideas were rough edged.  I sit here now, removed from the actual moves 4 months, and it has gotten better.  We still have some things in boxes in the garage that we will get to sometime soon.  We still have a few things in storage at my Mother in Law’s house,  Things that we will not be using anytime soon, like our kitchen sink.

I will be trading the lawn mower for the snow blower soon, not being able to store both at this new house.  The good news is, there are no other storage units.  We have downsized, cleaned out and restarted so many things now.  I have finally gotten rid of all the empty boxes and garbage from the move as well.

We are finally getting the house organized in a manner that works for us.  We are figuring out how to live in the place again, and how to make everything work.  Just tonight I had to find my cable that hooks my computer to the TV so we can watch some stuff over the internet.  We have everything, it is just a matter of finding some of it.  Some things may never be found, or they may be in the few boxes left in the garage.  Some things we may never miss.  It is a good thing to purge much of this out of our lives.

We are now looking ahead for Christmas and all of the materialistic madness that it entails.  We are purging some of the kids old toys that we have hung onto for years.  Some things that they just don’t play with, some that are broken, and some they have just grown out of.  I am getting ready to put some of it up on eBay to make come coin for new toys to replace them when Santa comes.

But through everything we are still doing well as a family.  There will always be money issues, I don’t know that we will ever be totally caught up until I either get my book sold or we win the lottery.  Just FYI, there is no lottery in Utah so I had better get writing.

We all have discovered that whatever happens or wherever we are our home is with the family.  It has always been a cliche, or just something that people have said but it is true, the pile of sticks you live in is only a pile of sticks until you make it a home.  We have a home.  We have a community around us with our church that is very supportive.  My parents still are not very supportive, my dad still hasn’t been to our house.  That is another post though.

This week we are looking forward to Thanksgiving in only a week and watching the weather closely, trying to decide when to hang the Christmas lights before the snow hits.  I finished decorating last year in a blizzard.  But we needed a wreath in the alcove.  Planning a big holiday dinner and gearing up for the holidays are more things that make a pile of sticks a home.   The kids love it, and of course I do as well.

The wife and I have always decorated for holidays, even in our crappy first apartment we had lights up.  We decorate for Halloween with as much gusto as Christmas.  Easter gets a turn, as does St. Patricks Day, the Fourth of July, and Thanksgiving.  Those traditions are things that make a home.  The kids remember what we had out last year, they remember the things that Grandma has made for us to put out.  It doesn’t matter where they are displayed.

So, all in all, the saga of the Sticks is over for now.   We are settled into a new pile and we are going to stay for a year or two.  We may never get through all of the boxes, or find some things that we have been looking for, but we have enough.  We have our family and the basics.  We have gotten over giving up the dog and the fish.  We are at peace with everything except the bank.  (this is a good place for a blatant hint to use my affiliate link if you need anything from Amazon.  just look over there in the sidebar)

Now, I need to get back on a schedule, and get my writing back on track, as well as  my business.  You know those commercials that says “Life comes at you fast”?  It is true.  It comes fast, but can be handled.

Have a great day, or else.

-Justin

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SAHD Friday: Re-establishing Roles

My family.
Image by twodolla via Flickr

If you have been reading this blog for any length of time you know by now that I am the stay at home parent in our house.  Over the summer however, my wife was home on maternity leave with our youngest son being born and all.

In September, she went back to work.  It has been interesting trying to re-establish our roles in the house and get back on a good routine.  Even this post is about a month in the making.  I have been trying to write it for that long without success.  I have been doing way too many things and putting this post off.  I have another one on procrastination in the works, maybe I should combine them!

It was quite a change when she went back to work, especially for the kids.  We had spent 3 months with her always home.  Now she was leaving again and I had to step back up as the full time homemaker as well as internet guru, company president, blogger etc.  None of these are hard, none of these are different than what we have been doing for years.
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